Partum Me?! What places are TOO grownup for baby?

Happy Turkey Day from Charlie!

Before I get started with this week’s post, I just wanted to wish everyone a very Happy Thanksgiving!  This year, we are clearly most thankful for the little guy who came into our lives seven months ago and has been nothing short of awesome since then.  I would give up all the turkey, stuffing, and gravy in the world to see that smile every day.  (But maybe not pumpkin pie.  Oh fine, I’ll give up the pumpkin pie, too.)  Charlie and I hope that all of you will be spending the holiday with family and/or friends and that you enjoy every second of it!

This past weekend marked a small milestone for Charlie, but one that we were excited about as city dwellers who eat out once a week or so: his first trip to a restaurant where he sat in a high chair.  Charlie’s not quite ready to feed himself and he ate before we went, but we brought a few toys to entertain him and went somewhere that we knew would be child-friendly.  The restaurant was a local independent place called The Hinge Cafe.  The joint is owned by two wonderful women who have a little one, themselves.  We go there for brunch at least once a month and have seen lots of children there.  Charlie was one of three highchaired babies during this trip and he did great!  Aside from the tossing of a few toys right at the foot of his chair, he pretty much entertained himself and most of the patrons around us.

We excitedly told some friends and family about this successful outing and almost everyone asked us where we went.  “Oh, just this local place,” I usually replied.  What followed in most of these conversations was a series of questions that seemed to be geared at finding out if we’d taken our kid to a restaurant with a bar and why we hadn’t taken him to a “family restaurant” like Applebee’s (which all have bars that serve monstrous drinks, by the way).  I was surprised that so many people just assumed that people with children would give up their usual favorite places and settle for lousy chain food, just because a kid is involved.  A couple weeks back, we took Charlie to the new beer garden in our neighborhood.  Granted it was noon on a Saturday, but Charlie had a great time looking around, flirting with one of the bartenders, and watching college football with his grandpa.  When I retold the story of this outing to some coworkers, they thought it was downright bizarre that I’d taken him to a place with the word “beer” in its title.  We did drink beer while we were there, but most of our money went towards some amazing Bavarian delicacies like locally-made bratwurst and the most amazing red cabbage I’ve ever had.  Perhaps it is different depending on whether you live in the city or in the suburbs, but we have so many great food options available to us in Philadelphia!  We figure that trips to good, independent restaurants will a) get him accustomed to sitting at a table where other people will be watching to make sure he is well-mannered and b) expose him to a variety of cuisines as early as possible.

As I started to think about writing this post, a friend contacted me and asked if I’d considered writing a post about the etiquette of bringing small babies to late night showings at the movie theater.  (I see nothing wrong with bringing a sleeping little one to a 10 pm showing as long as you aren’t interrupting sleep to do it, it’s only once in a blue moon, and you aren’t going to an opening night showing of something like a Twilight movie that will be packed to the gills.)  Her question made me think on a broader level about what modern families deem appropriate places for babies and what they consider to be off-limits.  I have friends who come from other countries and they tell me that in other areas of the world, children are allowed inside local pubs all the time, that they sit among the grownups at dinner parties, and that it is not rare to see them snoozing on a couch while an adult gathering goes late.

Now of course, late night trips to the movies, attending dinner parties, and eating out at local brew pubs are not things that I would condone as an every night activity.  And it should be noted that my opinion on restaurants is that dinner with baby should happen long before the evening rush of couples on dates and folks who are meeting for drinks.  It also goes without saying that a child who is disruptive should not be allowed to stay in a place where he might be bothering other patrons.  But I also want to know that I’ve done everything I can to make sure my child is exposed to a range of cultures, that he learns how to converse in a group, and that he learns even the most basics of table manners.  In today’s day and age, I like the idea that parents are raising citizens of the world, instead of just citizens of their own living room.  It’s also a good thing, in my opinion, that children get to see their parents enjoying themselves and socializing.  As for the movie thing, though, that’s all about just having two hours to regain your sanity and escape into a good flick; also very important.

What do you think about family trips to non-family restaurants or late night movie jaunts?  What places did you take your child where people seemed to question whether it was appropriate?