It has been five weeks since my husband deployed.
And I’ve hit a wall. It’s been a very rough couple of days and I feel like I can’t catch a break. My daughter is acting up like you wouldn’t believe. It’s hard to believe a girl so cute and so small can be such a terror. She’s effectively been kicked out of the child center at the gym, which means I can no longer go. The reason this is so upsetting – other than the obvious fact that she is poorly behaved and I can’t seem to correct it – is that the gym is the only time during the day that I get to myself. It’s an hour here and there through out the week that I have grown to rely on. I hate working out, but I love the break. Or loved it.
So, I’ve been feeling sorry for myself today. And I plan to drown my sorrows in some Jeni’s ice cream tonight.
Sigh.
After taking a minute to catch my breath and just…. breathe… I recognize that while my current situation is anything but ideal I am truly lucky and have much to be thankful for.
I am thankful for my family.
I am thankful that my husband is the hardest working person I know, and that we get to have some “family time” on Skype.
I am thankful that my mom, grandmother, dad, stepmom, brother, nephew and more family live so close this year. It’s the first time I’ve lived near family since I was in law school over 6 years ago. It’s been wonderful to celebrate my daughter’s birthday with family, to have family over to dinner on a random weeknight, to watch football on the weekends while the kids color with their cousins, to enjoy a Thanksgiving feast with family, and to see all the cousins compete in a gingerbread house decorating competition. (Holy mess!)
As hard as this year is, I am thankful for the experience because it means I get to spend time with family. Watching the kids play with their cousins, grandparents and great grandmother is priceless. As discouraged as I am today, I know I need to appreciate each moment because, before you know it, the year will be over and we’ll move away.
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This post is part of the SHOUT! Go Play program. And while I was supposed to write about how we Go Play as a family, I started writing (and crying) and this post happened instead. But, you know what? My kids don’t need to be outside playing some organized family activity to make a total mess of their clothes. They eat eat, color and and act crazy every day and make a total mess of themselves while just being. And every night I am thankful that SHOUT! works so I can spray my kids’ clothes and put off doing another load of laundry for a day or two.
Christine
December 1, 2010I can understand what you’re feeling. My husband is deployed and has been gone for 5 months now. It’s very hard. I will say that Skype has been keeping me sane too, so glad to be able to see him every day if only on my netbook.
Hang in there and take care