I’ve heard the rumor that “3 is worse than the terrible twos.” And that is certainly true in my house. Yesterday it was confirmed.
I thought I had to worry about my daughter biting everyone and causing trouble at school this summer, but turns out it’s my son causing problems. When I picked him up from school, instead of running to me like he normally does, his teacher picked him up and gave me a subtle “Come here, we need to talk” nod. Uh oh.
His teacher said, “What do we need to tell your mom today?”
Preschool Boy, with a giant grin on his face, “I have a bad abbitude.”
No I didn’t misspell that. He insists the word is “abbitude.” It was cute and endearing when he was tattling on other children (“So and so has a bad abbitude.”). But when he’s ratting on himself? Not so cute.
Anyway, his teacher proceeded to tell me that both of the teachers in the classroom has noticed increasingly negative behavior from my son. She said he throws tantrums, pounds his fists on the floor and the table and the straw that broke the camel’s back was when he screamed, “NO!” when the teacher asked him to use the bathroom. {cue my weeping mama tears}
The truth is, he’s been increasingly difficult at home so I’m not all that surprised. I’m just disappointed. I was hoping that Preschool Boy was laying on the charm and being his sweet self at school while saving his tantrums for home. I want my kid to be liked. I want him to be kind and thoughtful and well behaved.
Obviously I’m glad the teacher talked to me. We can now use the same language and be consistent when dealing with his tantrums and “bad abbitude.” It’s just upsetting to learn that he’s causing trouble at school and disappointing them. I will love him no matter how poorly he behaves, but other people are less forgiving. I know this is probably wrong, but I’d really like him to be the teacher’s pet and not the troublemaker. And, in my head he was the teacher’s pet. It hurts my heart a little bit to learn he’s not.
So I’ll read up on the mind of three year old and how to handle temper tantrums. And I will hope his teachers have patience and love and that this is only a phase. A short one.
Nicole
April 23, 2010I’m going through that as well with my three-year-old. My favorite line of his today, was, “I don’t like to obey.”
I’m looking forward to hearing any tips that you find are working . . . *sigh*
Well, at least he’s honest. LOL Sorry you’re having a rough patch with your 3 year old, too.
Emilie
April 23, 2010Ah that does suck. I think that could be Warren in another year. Lucian has outbursts but they are short lived and not that often. He is a teacher’s favorite. Warren on the other hand has been really testing me these last couple of weeks and is really making me thing the terrible twos really are the terrible twos. (For him anyway.) He totally had a melt down grocery shopping today and I had to leave the store. Not fun…
Jana
April 23, 2010It’s always a changing challenge, isn’t it? Sending you happy mama vibes as you work through this one!
Alison W
April 23, 2010Oh. Dear. God. Why did I have kids? My son will be 3 on May 2nd. And I’ve heard 2 is worse than 3. How am I going to survive!
I ask myself how I will survive at least once a day. LOL
Emily
April 23, 2010Ooh I’m sorry! I know there is that certain feeling when you find out your kid has been misbehaving. My son is almost three and he has a hard time sometimes. I do hope the terrible twos/threes will pass!
Jamie @ Love To Shop Mom
April 23, 2010We are hitting the Terrible Two’s right now, my Little Miss Diva in Training has just discovered what Terrible Toddler is this week and I am just about loosing my mind. I understand what you are going through right now! Good Luck!
OH I saw that you are going to EVO’10! I am going too, would love to meet you in person!
tinygiraffeshop
April 24, 2010Totally agreed…3 is harder than 2 in that respect. Things are easier in some ways, but at 3 they really know what they want and that can be tough!
I do think some of his frustration come from knowing what he wants and not always getting it. He just doesn’t handle not getting his way well.
April
April 24, 2010We’re definitely getting into the “terrible 3s” even though we officially have one month until Kiefer turns 3.
We’ve noticed a direct relationship between lack of nap (or too short a nap) and one bad attitude. Kiefer doesn’t like to sleep at daycare and when he doesn’t it is not a fun evening for us. Everything is yelled, demanded and if we tell him to do something, he says, “I DON’T WANT!” Ugh.
I’m sure it will be short lived. It will be all too soon before they’re teenagers who don’t want anything to do with us!
He has definitely had different period of being difficult. But, this phase is on a new level. Especially since his teacher talked to me.
I’m actually really trying to observe his behavior and am starting to worry it’s more than just the terrible 3s. Like, maybe it’s a bigger issue.
LeeAnn
April 25, 2010How could that sweet looking little boy be getting into trouble? But I hear you! My daughter is the teacher’s pet at school and every time I have to sign an incident report where she was the one hurting another kid, I always worry that they’ll stop liking her as much as they do. Like you said, I will always love her no matter what, but other people may not. Luckily I don’t have to sign too many of those so for now we’re good. But if 3 is worse than 2, that might change.
Good luck to you!